Control

Hi Friends!

It has been a while; life has been a complete roller coaster. God has really decided I am one of his strongest soldiers this year. I made a big realization recently that it is okay not to be in control but also not to let life happen to you. To not be in the passenger seat of my life. This realization occurred because recently, someone very close to me, whom I love dearly, passed away. I was sad and hurt, but I also understood that God is in control, and He knows why it was time for this person to leave Earth to go find Him. In my reflection on everything going on in my life recently, which has been pretty chaotic, I realized that I had developed a habit of letting things in my life just happen. For example, instead of hoping or making plans for the future or even dreaming about the future, I would avoid it as much as possible because of my fear of disappointment. This fear developed due to past disappointments in my life. I felt like there was no point in making plans or wanting things because if it is not in God's plans, it just won't happen, or it just won't go my way. So without realizing it, I stopped living in a way. I became the one in the passenger seat in my own life; rather than working with God to figure out what the right steps were, I just gave up. That was hard to admit, and decide to make a change because I still feel scared. But reflecting on the life of someone who meant the world to me and looking back at how they lived their life made me feel silly for letting fear take over my life. We are here for a short amount of time, and I want to live a life worth God's approval. It is so easy to get wrapped up in the things of this world, but I want to make an impact in God's kingdom in whatever way that I can. Control is something that I know that I have a problem with. I am learning to let God be in control but also work with him rather than not try at all. God knows what is best for me. I want to live my life to the best of my ability and do the best in everything I do, and I encourage you to do so. Let's not let the circumstances of life take control of what we are passionate about and the purpose we are made for or dime our light. We are all worthy, and so we need to act like it. Life can be challenging, but it is all worth it. Life is worth living and experiencing the good and bad. I want to look at my life and be proud of every moment because I know I did my best.

Remember, You Are Loved!

- C :)